20 years on....

20 years passed today since the day you left us. I can hardly believe it. Where did 20 years go?

You fought so hard to stay with us. Your family. Your parents. Your partner. Your kids. Your sisters. Me.

Cancer is a bastard disease. You gave it your best fight ever and man were you a fighter!

Not a day goes by that I don't think about you. Wondering what you'd be doing if you were still here. My guess it would be doing something for your beloved horses or running around for your kids. Wow - you should see them now Aunty. How grown up they are. The girls are so much like you. Splitting images!

Not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here. Would you be proud of me? Would you be happy for me? 

I'm not that 14 year old bratty teenager that I was when you left! Not a day goes by that I don't wish that you could see me now! Would you love my kids as much as you loved me? Would you spoil them as much as you spoilt me? They would have freaking loved you!! I did! I still do. I always will.

I can't fathom that I'm already 4 years older than you were when you left. I never saw you as being this age. You were my cool Aunty! You taught me to ride a horse. You taught me to drive a car. You taught me about life!

I remember the day you went to sleep for the last time. I remember everything about that day. It's funny, I even remember what I had for breakfast. I still hate peanut butter on toast 20 years later.

I understood that you needed to go. You were so tired. Your body fought a huge battle. I understood but I hated it! Hated it with a passion. It wasn't fair. It's not fair. Why you?

I'd give anything to have you back here again. With your family. With me.

I love you Aunty. Always and forever.

I thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new.


I thought about you yesterday, and days before that too. 



I think of you in silence. I often speak your name.


 

Now all I have are memories and your picture in a frame. 



Your memory is my keepsake, with which I'll never part.


 

Heaven has you in its keeping. I have you in my heart..

To my lovely blog readers. I really need your help. I'm having trouble drumming up support for the 200+km ride that I'm doing to help conquer cancer and to honour my beautiful Aunty. You can read more about it here. Could you help me? I need donations and help to to spread the word. Could you spare $2? Would you forward this on to others that might be able to help? I need to get the word out there!! I'd appreciate any help that I can get!

If you've been following me on facebook you may or may not know that I have registered for a 220km bike ride  for the Perth Ride to Conquer Cancer in 2013. This is a cause close to my heart as I have lost some very special people to this horrible disease. As part of my entry I need to fund raise a minimum of $2500 to take part in the actual ride. I really hate asking for donations but I've been told that it's the only way! Do you have a spare $2? Every little bit helps. All money raised will go directly to support cancer patients and their families and all donations $2 and over are tax deductible. Thank you!!

Click here to donate